"Freedom is loyalty to one's best self and principles, and it is often disloyalty to general idols and fetishes." Mark Twain
According to my studies, my experiences and my expressions, I see human growth as a travel - a steep rise from dependence to independence to interdependence into transcendence. This lifetime journey begins at birth, when we are determined by our parents and other loved ones.
The process of becoming physically independent is almost automatic with age. It is a natural part of growing up, and for the majority of us it comes easily. We take up jobs, go from our parents' homes, get married and have kids - steps toward taking responsibility for our lives as well as for the family members that are now dependent on us. For treinamentos em tubarão
, our quest for liberty ends here.
However, being human isn't just about physical and material development. We will need to develop emotionally and intellectually. Emotionally, a lot of us remain dependent - allowing situations around us control our emotions. We can't claim to be independent when we still enable normal events - traffic jams, forgetful partners, colleague missing deadlines at work, unreasonable clients - to activate feelings of anger, frustration, helplessness or despair. If we're not masters of our emotions, can we actually be masters of our own destiny?
Emotional maturity or independence is not about attempting to control what happens to us. Rather it's about how we react to what happens to us. It is freedom of choice in how we react to adverse circumstances. We can lash out, as we may have done as children, or we could choose to be reasoned and thoughtful and positive about going forward.
In my workshops on discovering one's true calling, I borrow a tool from 'The Art of Possibility' from Ben and Rosamund Zander. I ask participants to invoke the sense of 'How Wonderful' whenever they're in a bad position. For instance, imagine you are late to an important interview because a flight was postponed. Would you experience it as a superb moment? Imagine your kid is embarrassing you by throwing a tantrum in public. Would you find that as wonderful?
Most participants look at me like I am crazy. "That would be just like lying to myself," the state. "Even if I say that a scenario isn't so bad, it's still a bad circumstance. It doesn't go away." As we workshop this idea further, they concede they're more likely to come up with creative responses when they're in a good mood than when they're angry and angry. They also see how a bothersome situation could actually be an excellent opportunity to learn something new or create some creative thoughts. They walk out thinking, "Hmm, I wonder if that might work. I will try it..."
Moving on to cognitive development, de Tocqueville remarked on how Americans have so little independence of mind but much freedom of discussion. I don't believe this lack of liberty in thought is unique to Americans. It's a global phenomenon.
Starting from our schooldays, we're taught answers to questions that we do not even have. We are led to think that there is 1 right answer and that there is some expert somewhere who has figured it out. As we grow into adults, we are brainwashed by the media, the marketing messages and the governmental propaganda; we live in the comfort of never having to exercise our intellect. From the Middle Ages, religion forced humanity into a set of faith. In today's times, we take the assumed wisdom of scientists and pseudo-scientists - like economists - without much question.